November 18th, 2008


Steven A. Taylor's Potluck Thanksgiving

This just might be the best Thanksgiving since the glory days of playing kickball in Port Townsend as a teenager with my aunt's now-loser ex-boyfriend and the rest of the Taylor brood.

I haven't found many tired, huddled masses who are without Thanksgiving plans this year - turns out more people have family that they're willing to visit than you'd think; who knew? But I recruited Big Iain! His parents are in far-away states and he can only afford Christmas plans to fly east. But, to augment the lack of refugees, not to mention the fact that Nate will be hours upon hours south in Oregon, I've got Kon during the day, not to mention my brother, his girlfriend, and the one, the only, The Hammer.

I'm making a fucking turkey! Aaaaaaagghhhhhh! No, it shouldn't be so scary, once you know what you're doing. Give it anywhere from 3 to 5 days to thaw out in the fridge (NEVER out in the open, unless you like your bird festering with disease), peel back the skin and butter the meat underneath with whatever herbs and spices you choose, cook on high for 20 minutes and then on low for 20 minutes per pound until your slow-cooked masterpiece is squirting more juices than a horny heterosexual chick at an All The Dick You Can Eat Festival. Fortunately, that's all I'm making, because I don't think I have the brain capacity to prepare other foods.

But, here's what I want, in no particular order, to go with and to come from others:

frozen corn
pumpkin pie with cool whip
fruit salad (just one can's worth, let's not go overboard)
dinner rolls
pillsbury croissants (because I'm not that big on dinner rolls, personally)
mashed potatoes for those so inclined to eat mashed potatoes
a can of yams
at least one green bean dish
cranberry sauce

I dunno, that sounds about right, doesn't it? Sounds good to me anyway. We don't need EVERYTHING on the list there. But it'd be pretty sweet if we could get a majority.

Here's the gameplan: after a night of partying in the city in celebration of Kon's visit, I'll cab it back to my place for a good night's sleep (a.k.a. a good 3-4 hours' sleep). Then I'll wake at 6am, preheat the oven, prep the bird, stick it in, and pass back out on the couch until 9am or so. Then: football on TV. First beer cracked open at 10am SHARP. So, my invitees better be here by then! At noon, we'll get a boot in

-- Remember those glass 1-liter boots I bought for me and my brother at the Wurstfest last week? Yeah, we're breaking them in (or at the very least taking one down before the meal) --

followed by feasting at 1pm. Then, we'll watch the Seahawks lose to Dallas, followed by card games with more drinking.

Sleeping arrangements will be interesting. I've got a bed that's all mine. We've got a Futon that could fit two people. Then, there's Nate's bed and some floor space. Unfortunately, blankets and pillows are fairly scarce. I've got an extra pillow from my bed that I can donate, and there's a down blanket that goes with the Futon. Pretty much, people will need to bring sleeping bags n' shit.

I'm excited. First turkey, let's hope at least 50% of us don't get sick. I'll consider the entire day a success if that happens. O'Doyle Rules.
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