September 26th, 2008


My Nose Makes Its Own Bubblegum!

So, I guess there will? won't? be a debate tonight. Will Obama just stand in front of one podium arguing with himself? Is there any way we can get a tandem of Shannon Sharpe and Emmitt Smith to go up against Obama, fielding questions about whatever the hell they're supposed to talk about, foreign policy or whatnot?

I'm staying out of it. I know McCain is just playing up this whole economic crash because he's an opportunist; I know there's nothing his presence in Washington will accomplish. I know Sarah Palin is a disgusting cow who needs to die 1,000 deaths (mild Metallica song reference). I know the old Republican knock-knock joke -

- Knock Knock
Who's There
9/11 Who?
You said you'd never forget! -

- and the fact that they're scumbags and if we continue on this downward spiral much longer we WILL have another economic crash akin to the Great Depression, because they're not fiscally conservative where it counts (or at all, for that matter).

But you know what? I don't care anymore. Obama will get my vote. I'll go with a Democrat one last time and if it doesn't work out: no more voting from me. I'm done. I don't give a shit anymore. They're all pieces of shit who don't give two rats asses about the Little Guy. After Obama's been eliminated - either with a loss here, or after 8 successful years in office - I'm done. Fuck politics, fuck the government, I'm going full-on anarchist after Obama and that's all I've got to say about that.

Because who can you trust anymore? The same fucks who've been running this country since the 70s keep getting re-elected and continue running this country AS fucks today. The only way to get these fucks out of office is to wait until they die of brain tumors or cancerous colons or fucking old age, and I can't wait that long!

You'll notice the good ones, they don't keep getting re-elected; only the fucks. Because, the fucks, you see, will do ANYTHING including rape their own mothers to get in power and stay in power. Which is why we've got a Congress full of fucks today who've got nothing better to do than fuck their own mothers all the live-long day.

In fact, fuck it, let McCain have the presidency. The more I think about it, the more I know we need to truly bottom-out as a nation. If 8 years of Bush couldn't break our spirit, why not tack on another 4 years of McCain's old-man bungling. Let him take the fall for Bush's heinous leadership. Do you know how hard it is to lose an election as an incumbant? If Bush couldn't bungle it in 2004, then you know it's pretty fucking hard. You've got to be an asshole of the Bush Sr., Jimmy Carter, Herbert Hoover variety to be a one-term president.

Speaking of Hoover, that guy might be our only hope. Let's remember this before we think we can ever ouster a fuckhead like George W. Bush again: you'll never dismiss an incumbant president during wartime JUST BECAUSE he's president during an unpopular war. I'd throw McCain in as an incumbant because at least he's from the same party as the sitting president. I mean, Nixon was a right pigfucker, and that man was overseeing the disaster that was Vietnam, and even THEN he was re-elected in a landslide. FDR would've been President For Life after getting us through the Great Depression and into WWII, but we know how that turned out.

But Hoover, Bush Sr., Jimmy Carter, those assholes were taken down because of the Economy. Ah ha! So that's the ticket, huh? We can murder foreigners until the cows come home, but if my job at the butt-sniffer plant is taken away from me, you're going down Gerald R. Ford!

God, how I hope and I pray every single day for another Great Depression. Hell, fuck it, give us two Great Depressions! I want to see tears streaming down the faces of rotten 15 year olds who can no longer get iPhones from their parents for getting a C in social studies. I want to see riots in the streets that'll make people forget the name Rodney King. I want the heads of Paris Hilton, Spencer & Heidi, Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, Lynne Spears, Jamie Lynn Spears, and Glenn Beck on wooden spikes outside the Capitol Building. I want the rich and famous barracading themselves in their Beverly Hills mansions while the wildfires burn all around them, set off by the lowly stockbrokers who haven't already killed themselves by jumping off of the Empire State Building.

I want bread lines. I want designer jeans matted with mud and dogshit. I want whores with bad skin wandering around like fist-fucked zombies because they can't afford the make-up they've been using all their lives to cover up their insecurities.

I want this country to fucking suffer for turning into what it has become. And I'm not saying I want massive deaths or acts of terrorism; that's no good. That just brings people together, ultimately leading to renewed hope for mankind. No, I want the opposite. I want psychological terrorism. I want people wondering when they're going to get to eat again. I want them to know what it's like to be homeless, living on the streets. I want the majority of this country's citizens to know what REAL hardships are like.

Then maybe they won't sit back and throw their votes away on a candidate because they think abortion sucks. Fuck that! Try picking your way through a dumpster and then tell me your views on fetuses!

Fucking rat bastards. The people of this country don't know how good they've had it. I don't care if you're living in San Francisco or Birmingham, you're all spoiled fucking twats and you'll get what's coming to you if you can't figure it the fuck out! Quit being stupid bitches, all of you!

God I hate everyone.