October 1st, 2007


Wide Awake With A Bullitt!

Man, I have NO court awareness at the new job. Bosses can come behind me doing jumping jacks and cartwheels and I'll still be sitting there staring blankly at my computer screen basking in my cavalier off-taskness.

I sit at what amounts to a long desk, with two very attractive ladies on either side of me. They pretty much do what I do, only they do lots more because they've been there longer and they don't temp. I know one is named Abby (or Abbi) and I'm pretty sure the other is named Meredith, which is going to make it VERY difficult for me to not call her Megadeth. That's it, if by some grace of God I have a kid and it's a girl, I'm naming her Megadeth ... er, Meredith.

What do I do, you ask? Oh, you didn't ask? Well fuck off, I'm gonna tell you anyway! Apparently, I'm a Universal Assistant. I perform tasks for whoever needs tasks done. Since no one needed tasks done the entire morning, I sat at my computer reading articles on Wikipedia until 12:30. Then, finally someone named Megan stopped by and had me complete a project the guy who was me before I arrived this morning started last week. See, I put the tabs in the magazine, and I put the magazine in the envelope, and I put the sticker on the envelope, and I seal the envelope. It's only slightly more complicated than that, but the jist is there.

This company is a magazine publisher, I guess. Lots of fashion-type magazines - not very big or broad; mostly based in major cities. There's one for New York, one for L.A., Vegas, Aspen, Boston, a few other major cities I guess. Imagine, like on the O.C., the Newport magazine, only instead of Julie Cooper-Nichol on every cover, it's actual celebs who've happened to have visited and/or live in the particular cities. All day long I'm surrounded by women and gay men, so, you know, I gotta like my chances here.

Excuse me, Megadeth, would you like a dried-out carrot stick? Six inches of orange, eyesight-improving goodness.

Since I've been up since 2am (don't ask, I can't explain it), I figure to crash here any minute now. Tomorrow's another day and, indeed, another dollar.
  • Current Music
    Joy Division - Shadowplay