January 4th, 2007

Don't Hassle the Hoff

Like 2006, But Way More Fuckin'

Look, I've said it before and I'll say it again: if you're gonna secretly tape 5th grade girls taking a dump in your home bathroom and store those files on your computer and then leave for vacation and have people housesitting for you, you've GOTTA put a password on that fucking computer!

I found that little nugget when I was looking through the local Seattle newspapers trying to find coverage on this: it appears there's some nine year old girl in Seattle who's pretty much retarded in every sense of the word. She can't move, can't talk, eats with a tube; essentially, she's - as her parents put it - a pillow. Carried everywhere, etc. So, what her parents have done is start treatment to keep her as a nine year old. She won't grow, won't develop - she already has the mental capacity of a three-month old - she'll just stay as she is for however long she is. I find this in a British newspaper and for the life of me - or for the five-or-so minutes I've tried - I can't seem to find it in a Seattle newspaper - rather, just the P-I. Who's sitting on this story? I think it's a fascinating idea and I'm just waiting for the uproar from Christian Fundamentalists with all this "tampering with God's creation" bullshit.

The only regret I have is that I didn't have a good time everywhere - only places I went

That's a quote from an article in The Stranger copy I nabbed on my way out of Seattle last week. The article's about 2006 regrets and the people who have them. Someone regretted not eating more bacon and I'd have to concur with that one. Another person regretted going to South Dakota - and South Dakota in general - and to ape that I'd definitely say I regret Utah's existence (except for the Arches, of course).

I don't know about the rest of you, but I rather enjoyed 2006. I think it made up for a right shitty 2005, that's for damn sure. Look, you didn't want to know me in ought-five because it wasn't a great year in the life of Steven A. Taylor. Now, let me preface that by saying, you probably wouldn't've known it to look at me, because around most people I appear to be having a grand ol' time even when I'm just sitting around picking goobers. But, mentally I wasn't all there. It was dark in ol' Duder's head lots of the time. Like time was slowly strangling me to death. Even in the times I actually was enjoying myself, I was a mess inside. And that kinda spilled over into 2006 a little bit too. I wasn't happy with my job, I wasn't happy with my social life, and I sure as shit wasn't happy in my non-existent love life. The one thing to bring me out of the funk was the decision to move here. From then on, it seemed like things just improved exponentially.

I don't think I can describe how uplifting and satisfying it feels to know that your job ... is going to end! I knew in April that, come the end of July, I wouldn't have to set foot in that fucking corporate office one more fucking time. I'm thinking from that moment on, life started getting better. I don't like working, but I don't like being unemployed either. There's something so daunting about having a job indefinitely that sucks the will to live right out of me. But, being unemployed brings its own special burden, because I know that every day I'm not getting paid is at least one more day I'm going to have to work eventually. Where it's at? Having a job, but knowing that job's going to end.

Then the summer clean rocked my fucking ass off. Sasquatch Music Festival, Vancouver BC trip with Josh, Taylor Family Camping Trip, Pearl Jam shows, quitting the job, The Last Great American Road Trip, the final hectic week in Seattle/Tacoma, and finally the big move here.

So, where do the regrets come in? Honestly, it's really not my style to harbor regrets for very long. Most things I end up regretting are things I do - inadvertent or not - that affect other people around me in a negative way. In which case, I'll do whatever's in my power to rectify the situation as quickly as possible, or dwell in sheer agony until I'm forgiven. See, the thing with me is, if I have a guilty conscience, I'm unable to live with myself until it's eradicated. Ergo, I don't do things that I'll regret long term.

Ergo, I regret nothing about 2006.

Except the bacon thing.
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    The Fiery Furnaces - Black-Hearted Boy